Relationships are difficult to maintain. But one thing that’s even harder is knowing when to call it quits and break up. It’s a sad reality that happens a lot, but people aren’t sure when to pull the plug. And when they do, it can be at a time where they’ve made some bad decisions.
Like getting married despite feeling like the relationship is dead.
In order to prevent these harder times, we’ve put together a list of signs and reasons for why your relationship is failing. These signs and reasons are subtle – like the way that you argue or communicate – but can shed light on where you and your partner stand in the relationship.
YOU’RE ON DIFFERENT PAGES
Love can overcome all kinds of obstacles, but only when everyone is on the same page. There needs to be some kind of agreement put in place to cover the fundamentals. Fundamentals like how to save and spend money, when and if to have kids or where to live. If people’s reasons for each one aren’t clear, there are going to be problems.
These problems take the form of arguments and while they suck, they are important to relationship in how you handle them. Signs of failing relationships is when one or the other withdraws from the argument. These withdrawals are signs of lower satisfaction with the relationship.
TOO HIGH STANDARDS
Another problem is when the standards of the relationship are too high. Some people expect the most out of their partner and that’s a problem because people make mistakes. There are bound to be slip ups.
What’s going to put a strain on the relationship is you or your partner being unsupportive and feeling disappointed in them. You should never be measuring up your partner with some unrealistic expectations.
Conversely, you should never compare your relationship with other relationships. Not only is it a sign that the relationship is failing, but it’s unrealistic. Every relationship is different in its own way. Sure there are certainly examples of “good and healthy relationships”, but they can be stretched.
SOME OTHER CONSIDERATIONS ARE:
- Maybe your standards for your partner are lower? If you see them as inferior to you, this will influence how you speak to them.
WHEN YOU COMMUNICATE, YOU USE BODY LANGUAGE MOSTLY
Communication is the key, but how we communicate in relationships is the key to a healthy one. While at first in relationships we often express ourselves, which is good. The problem stems as time goes on. Communication becomes less and less proper and there is an expectation that our body language will convey what we mean.
The reality is we’re not mind readers. We can easily miss the meaning behind why someone is sighing or rolling their eyes or when there is silence.
And even if we do communicate, it’s important to be open to compromises too. Whether it’s something trivial like what to eat to something serious, it’s important we compromise. Relationships are constant works in process and the key to them lasting is making compromises.
Part of those compromises sometimes means taking the blame for problems. Those who refuse to take fault put strains because it makes the other feel inferior or the victim of every problem.
Another aspect is how we approach arguments and conflict as well. While some jump in head-first, others will hesitate. Some people will go as far as to deny the existence of their relationship issues.
Part of why people do this is because people are afraid to be alone. They’d rather settle with being in a relationship over having to deal with problems. The problem with that is that the problems will come back eventually.